A Special Story For Kids About THE OBSCENE FAIRYTALE
The monarch asks the best hero in the nation to save the princess when she goes missing. A hero who dislikes butterflies, though, is of little use.
Follow the story of a misfit princess, a villain who makes cookies, and a tooth-brushing dragon as they make their way to a shocking conclusion that must be read to believe.
I must caution you. This book is Horrendous!
One of the pages has leaked, and the cover is covered in muck.
Even some of the wording in the order is incorrect.
Do not claim that I did not warn you since it is the worst of the worst.
Our tale starts with a horrible king,
He never enacted any legislation that made sense.
There is no such day as Tuesday, and as long as I am king, I won’t hear any more about it, he chuckled.
Monday was always followed throughout the kingdom by either the second Monday or the first Wednesday.
His daughter has the worst princess qualities.
Despite the daily instruction she received in princess manners, she was not elegant and refined like most princesses.
She never gave her hair a brush.
She was quite cunning and reeked of bananas that were at least a month old.
Even in this story, she set traps. [The Princess’ traps are shown in illustrations throughout the narrative]
The Princess vanished one day.
There was a message in her place that stated:
“I have the Princess with me.
You will never catch me.
The King instructed the nation’s greatest hero to locate his daughter after reading the note twice to make sure he understood it.
It so happened that the nation’s greatest hero was also its worst.
He was frequently too terrified to leave his house, and butterflies also gave him anxiety.
The greatest of all the heroes in the kingdom, he had, however, once vanquished two caterpillars and a moth in a single conflict.
The villain was also horrible as the hero rode to his castle, the cruellest in the realm.
Whenever he could, he brought flowers to elderly women.
And he once constructed a house for someone in need out of pure generosity. [The hero]
The hero invaded the castle of the villain’s villain and charged into the dungeon.
He shook in his armour and cried, “Surrender the Princess!”
The villain claimed, “I don’t have a princess; I use this dungeon to make cookies, but be careful; there’s a leak down here.” [An illustration of a princess trap using floating words.]
The protagonist was more perplexed than usual.
Who took the Princess if not you, then who? questioned the hero. “We should go inquire of the dragon’s opinion.”
Remember, this was a terrible dragon.
Instead of being terrible and savage like dragons are supposed to be, he was renowned for being orderly and smart.
He always washed his teeth at night, and when he breathed, there was only minty freshness; there was no fire.
When they discovered the dragon, he was in a bad mood.
He exclaimed, “Someone’s stolen my gold and put this message in its place.”
It said:
“The Princess has your gold!”
It is now mine!
This is strange, the hero said.
Very strange, the bad guy said.
The dragon who constantly flossed his teeth when he was angry said, “Frmph.”
Maybe the Queen is aware of something.
When they got there, the Queen was pacing the castle.
Actually, she wasn’t that horrible (for it was she who hired the royal scribe who wrote this very book).
She sobbed, “My jewels are gone. “My nice silk, diamonds, and books.”
They’ve been stolen, and someone has left this horrible note.
It said:
“I have your prize!
Don’t bother attempting to find it.
The hero declared, “Whoever has taken your riches has the Princess.”
The bad guy said, “Look, here are some flowers.”
The dragon exclaimed, “Look, there are tracks in the dirt on the floor.”
The tallest part of the castle’s tallest tower’s tallest tower was reached by following the footprints all the way up.
All of the riches, books, jewellery, and silk were covered in dust when they looked inside.
The Princess was perched atop the heap on a throne.
The Queen questioned, “Why did you steal these items and have us go looking for you?
I was hesitant to attend my writing lessons. Who needs writing, the Princess questioned?
You do, the Queen said. The knight, the dragon, and the villain all nodded in agreement.
The Princess was forced to apologise and return the items she had taken.
The Princess was required to attend her classes six days a week starting on that day by the King.
When they started, she was a terrible student, but she improved every day.
The dragon spent hours cleaning all the mud off his coins.
The villain began to enjoy soggy cookies, and he frequently cooked them.
The hero made the decision that it was time to confront a butterfly. He lost, too.
I was hesitant to attend my writing lessons. Who needs writing, the Princess questioned?
You do, the Queen said. The knight, the dragon, and the villain all nodded in agreement.
The Princess was forced to apologise and return the items she had taken.
The Princess was required to attend her classes six days a week starting on that day by the King.
When they started, she was a terrible student, but she improved every day.
The dragon spent hours cleaning all the mud off his coins.
The villain began to enjoy soggy cookies, and he frequently cooked them.
The hero made the decision that it was time to confront a butterfly. He lost, too.
The Queen, on the other hand, ordered that the entire heinous story be contained within one of her murky novels.
I forewarned you that this book was terrible, and it is finally over!
Maybe you could come up with a better one someday.